I decided to stop off in Bangkok for four nights between Christmas and New Year simply to get some tropical winter warmth and sunshine on the back of a trip to Nepal.  I wanted a 5 star hotel with a good outdoor pool and a great reputation, on the banks of the Chao Phraya river, where I figured it would be more peaceful and less polluted than in the city centre.  Four hotels – the Mandarin Oriental, the Siam, the Shangri-La and the Peninsula – all met these requirements, and on reviewing their websites I decided on the latter, as it seemed to be less ostentatious than the others. The Siam is a little out on its own a few kilometres upstream, but the others are clustered together close to Taksin Bridge and BTS Skytrain station.  Unlike the others, the Peninsula is on the west bank of the river, but it has a fleet of complimentary Thai-styled river boats which ferry one across to either the Mandarin Oriental or to the BTS Skytrain station at Taksin Bridge, (frequently) throughout the day until 11pm. The so called “river of kings” is surprisingly busy with loud, polluting river taxis with enormous “long tail” outboard engines, plus overcrowded 50m long public river buses, private tour boats and huge cargo barges and at night there are scores of flashy ‘dinner cruise’ boats which never seemed to be busy, despite it being the festive party time of year.  Crossing the busy river, even when the water was ‘choppy’, always felt safe due to the skills of the coxswain and the eyes of his crewmate, who handed out mineral waters and towels in between keeping lookout.  There were plenty of life vests on board, but we didn’t have to wear them.

I decided to splurge out and arranged for us to be met at the airport in one of the Peninsula’s dark green 24 year old Rolls Royce Silver Shadows.  It was all very refined and comfortable, but at 8pm is was dark outside and I couldn’t see ‘ordinary members of the public’ stare at us in envy and admiration (or pity and disgust).  The journey took 90 minutes, with the final kilometre taking half an hour, such is Bangkok’s traffic. On the way back on New Year’s Eve, again at 8pm, but with much less traffic on the roads, it only took 30 minutes door to door!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our arrival at the hotel was ‘grand’, with several white-uniformed staff lining up to say “sawasdee cap” and presenting each of us with a garland of orchids, and welcoming us into the festively decorated lobby area, before we were taken up to our deluxe suite to be ‘checked in’ there.  The 23rd floor suite had a leather inlaid work desk near the entrance and a small toilet room. This opened onto the living area with low level table, sofa and two armchairs, a dining table and a large TV. There was also a mini bar and tea and coffee making facilities.  Floor to ceiling windows on two sides (we were on a corner) looked down onto hotel grounds, the Chao Phraya, the Mandarin Oriental and the skyscrapers of central Bangkok beyond.  A vestibule area had a wardrobe, drawers, a safe and a luggage storage area, and led into the bathroom which had a large built-in bathtub (with a TV screen), enclosed toilet and spacious shower, two wash basins and loads of marble.  Next door to that was the bedroom with a super comfortable superking bed, an ottoman at its foot, plus an armchair and a small writing cum make-up desk and chair, another TV and another mini bar.  This was a large and very comfortable suite with a magnificent view, so I felt reassured by my selection.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There were some other features in the room I liked too: tropical fresh fruits (though not refreshed daily), copious bottles of mineral water, separate aircon for the living and bedrooms, and a nifty little LED display of the outside air temperature.  There was also a secret compartment into which staff could place a daily newspaper, or one could leave shoes to be shined.

But after a day or two I became irritated by several other things: The a/c in the bedroom didn’t work properly and I found myself being too cold; The bedroom TV remote didn’t work; we weren’t given any newspapers (our booking confirmation promised a National paper (Bangkok Post) and an international one of our choice each day); the hotel’s ATM didn’t work properly (it only issued small withdrawals but charged a flat fee each time); there was no coffee in our tea/coffee selection; travel advice given by the concierge desk severely underestimated traffic, boat, train and walking times, so we were late for every restaurant booking we had; every day a card was placed in our room warning us that the windows would be cleaned the next day, but they never were.  I raised these issues with a duty manager over breakfast on the 3rd morning but only some of the issues were later fixed. In compensation I was offered a free Rolls Royce transfer back to the airport and he took the room service coffee off our bill, which we’d had to order because the housekeep hadn’t put coffee in the room.  Honestly I expected a bit more than that!

In the mornings we took breakfast at their busy river terrace, except on the first morning when we didn’t know where to go, we had it in the lobby.  At the river terrace one can eat indoors or outside.  We did both. Bangkok was experiencing a “cold snap” when we were there, and morning temperatures were a mere 22 Celsius, so we found outside to be very comfortable, but the long-tail boats on the river are very noisy.  Tiny pretty little doves and sparrows wander around looking for crumbs. There’s a good spread of cereals, juices, cold meats, fruits and pastries inside and outside there are live food stations making cooked breakfasts to order, including many asian options.  One can request freshly squeezed juices, which are much better than those in the buffet display, but one morning we waited thirty minutes to get them!  Breakfast times were always very busy, but the longest we had to wait for a table was two minutes, and the numerous staff seemed to cope well with the crowds of multi-national diners: my praise to the F&B manager.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aside from one day of sight-seeing (which was utter hell waiting for overcrowded river busses at the horribly overcrowded Royal Palace and Wat Arun), we spent the day relaxing by the hotel pool. It’s an attractive spot, with nicely padded loungers around a tiered narrow pool sitting perpendicular to the river. There’s a bar (though one would mostly order from ones lounger) offering beers, cocktails and wines and also a decent food menu.  And they give one good nuts and rice crackers with the drinks.  One day I ordered a sushi and sashimi platter, which was enormous, really for two people.

The pool area has good, clean toilets and changing areas below ground.  To one side is a water plant filled canal (or ‘klong’) from where a large water monitor caught everyones attention one day.  To the other side, but hidden from view, except when one looks down from ones room, is one of the small patches of traditional Bangkok which ones sees scattered across the city, where people live in corrugated iron shacks. All across town these small patches of land sooner or later find their way onto the market to be developed (and the occupants evicted).

For me the pool area wasn’t as big as I would have liked. There were signs warning people they would be evicted from their loungers if they left them for more than 30 minutes, but even so, there were times when it was hard to find two free loungers next to each other.  In the afternoon the hotel’s shadow falls over most of the pool area which makes it even harder to grab a spot in the sun.  I think about five of us wore Villebrequin swimming shorts, which I find to be a good indicator of the type of person at a hotel!

The Peninsula has an outstanding spa in a separate three storied building close to the pool area. A wooden walkway next to the small canal takes one to the impressive, scented, luxurious treatment rooms.  I had a fabulous Balinese massage one afternoon and immediately booked what they billed as “The Ultimate” session for both me and Mr A, for the next morning.  We had a large private spa suite for FOUR hours, which included a body scrub, a facial, a massage and Thai “singing bowls”. That was a new one on me: I lay on a mattress on the floor, closed my eyes, then the therapist softly banged some antique-looking metal bowls around my body, and the deep, soft tones vibrated through my head and body, stimulating a great sense of relaxation. I liked it, as did Mr A, who I could hear snoring during his turn!  After more than three hours of the therapists doing their magic on us, they left us to soak in the large whirlpool bathtub which was inside the treatment room.  All in all it was the most blissful of my spa experiences anywhere.

We checked out of the hotel around 7.30pm on 31st December, but I’d had to agree to pay for an extra half day. I decided not to haggle over this because they told me they were doing me a favour because they didn’t want any check outs at all on New Year’s Eve!  Only much later, when I reviewed my bill, did I notice that I wasn’t in fact charged for the half day.

My final bill, for four nights in a deluxe suite, spa treatments, drinks by the pool, a sushi platter, one light too service dinner, a few eau de vie nightcaps in the hotel’s charmingly cosy Bar, and one-way airport transfer in a Rolls Royce, came to THB155,732 (c£3,700); a hefty price for a short hotel break for two!  I don’t imagine it would have been less if I’d stayed at one of the other luxury riverside properties.

The Peninsula Bangkok is a five star luxury hotel and it prices itself accordingly. Unfortunately I left somewhat disappointed in my experience, and loaded with a stinking cold (which I believe was a consequence of my overly refrigerated bedroom).  I would have felt better if their management had taken a bit more off my bill to compensate me for the service issues I notified them of.  In terms of service, I found all the staff to be well trained, but I felt they lacked ‘heart’ and true empathy towards their guests. Everyone always greeted us with a friendly “sawasdee”, but I rarely witnessed any real evidence of a warm emotional connection with anyone after that.  Maybe I should only go to smaller hotels in the future, where it’s much easier (in my experience) to make a connection with the people who are working there.

Overall 7.5/10